Poem by Lucas Brown

Time in a Bottle

You know, Jim Croce wrote this for his son right before he died.

Fucking plane wreck, just when his music was getting big.

The lyrics, sweet and haunting—

the box would be empty except for the memory

of how they were answered by you.

My father, sitting in the leather recliner next to me,

began telling me of how he prayed every night for nine months,

begging for me to just be born healthy.

You know Luke, I’d like to think how you have the best of me

in you, but I know you are much more.

Looking back at it, I wish I would have

held these words more when they first left his lips.

There are many things I wish I would have done in this life,

and plenty that I wish I never did,

but I’m glad that I had you.

I remember how depressed I was

fighting with your mother all the time,

it seemed nobody wanted me around—

my own family wasn’t even speaking to me.

But, when you were born,

all these things meant nothing,

there was only you, my little baby boy.

I remember bringing pizza to the delivery room

with Papa for your mother right after you were born.

Then I held you in my arms, you little bastard,

and couldn’t believe I had brought another world

into life.

His eyes were now welling with tears.

The song, now on repeat, still drifted around us—

I’ve looked around enough to know that you’re the one

I want to go through time with.

He paused for a moment, saying to me

You know I love you more than anything in this world Luke,

I wish someone would have told me this growing up,

but that’s just not how my parents were raised.

I always promised myself that I would always tell you

how much I love you, because you can never tell someone enough.

Six years from that memory, the song is finding me again—

Me, sitting in the car, looking across the water

at the serene scene of the Dam

can’t help but to feel both joy and sadness,

missing the honestly our relationship.

My mind is stuck on the lyrics now,

the song takes me somewhere else:

And there never seems to be enough time

to do all the things you want to do once you find them.

Lucas Brown is currently finishing his degree in Speech and Hearing Sciences at Edinboro University of Pennsylvania. He is also working towards a degree in English. His poems aim to convey a stream of consciousness, as well as capture memories and experiences. Poetry has been his passion ever since he first started writing. His work has been published by Chimera Art and Literary Journal. It has also been featured on 2GirlsOneBench Podcast. He is a regular contributor of Marías at Sampaguitas.