Paradise Lost me, but I know it’ll find me again
Sitting in Ms. Crane’s eleventh grade
British Literature class, my world, and
John Milton world were hanging by a chain,
as he was suffering the loss of his second wife,
and his infant daughter.
Milton counted twelve parts to his whole biblical story,
as I counted mine throughout the years.
1: the year I survived since birth
2: the year I suffered abuse from my babysitter
3: the year I swore for the first time in Washington D.C.
4: the year I do not remember, but remember those of my cousins’
5: the year I started preschool
6: the year I started kindergarten
7: the year I knew what it was like to drift apart from my best friends
8: the year I became familiar with the word, “popularity”
9: the year I knew what it was like to be alone and friendless
10: the year I was convinced that having a best friend and laughing were unacceptable
11: the year I had my first real crush on a boy
12: the year I knew what it was like to be an ostensible middle school “loser.”
As I counted the years with the months,
I knew that I would live even after the twelfth
Month,
Year,
Grade,
And far beyond.
John Milton, if you could live after you published your twelfth book,
I could live a long life, too.
April Frances Federico is an up-and-coming poet, journalist, activist, and visual artist. She has a specific ardor for women's rights and Title IX issues. She is a huge literature nerd studying Creative Writing with minors in Arts Management and Visual Arts at Roger Williams University. She is also the voice behind The April Diaries and her work has been published in Rose Quartz, Ayaskala, honey & lime lit, Kissing Dynamite, Satin Soulbits, and HEAL(er) Mag.
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